florescences | adolphe catchall

[ she doesn't let go, not yet, so she does try to hold onto him harder when he tries to push her off. however, she does mute her emotions a bit. his emotions should be his own, but she's worried about how much they're a void. ]

Please, Adolphe. Won't you let me feel for you?

[ not in the way of forcing her emotions on him through the weekly effect, but to care for him, to care about him, to love him. ]

You can do whatever you want as long as you're not pushing them onto me—

[ He struggles and squirms in her hold. Oh, he feels so weak right now. ]

[ she loosens her hold, so he can break free, if he wants. ]

That's not what I'm trying to do.

I know... I know. No one is trying to do that, but it keeps happening.

[ It keeps crossing boundaries that he doesn't like. ]

That's why I hate it so much.

[ There's no more strength and he just falls. If Elysia doesn't hold him up, he'll collapse onto the floor with all the glass shards. ]

[ she is not going to let him fall into glass. she catches him and holds him again. she's not sorry, but it only makes her emotions ache faintly, faintly because she doesn't want adolphe to lash out or crash out. ]

Because you want to be keep separate from others? Or because it encroaches on things you think you don't deserve? Or...

Is it because you're afraid?

[ looks at the glass shards everywhere

You sure he hasn't lashed out yet?? ]

... I can't wait tell what's mine. The one thing I can call mine. It's...

[ muddled ]

[ she meant lash out again. again!!!

there's a moment of silence, a complicated twist in her emotions before elysia calms herself and makes her emotions fade away. her voice is soft and gentle. ]

It will always be yours, but why won't you try for more?

Try for more what... I keep trying. That's all I can do and it's not enough. It's never enough.

[ The void-like hollow emotions decrease, which is replaced with a deep setting— ]

I'm tired. I want to stop. I can't even do that after I die.

What's not enough? Enough for what? What are you trying to do?

[ she is trying to be careful, trying not to set him off again, but mostly, she wants to understand, but it does pain her to hear all of this.

she isn't ignoring the last part of what he said, but she wants to get a better sense of what's wrong. ]

... To like living.

[ Elysia will probably sense that Adolphe is nowhere near mentally exploding again, but there's a deep-seated exhaustion and apathy that's slowly starting to sink in as well. ]

[ she closes her eyes. she doesn't like that, but it's not something that's strange to her. it's not so shocking, after the memories she's seen, but it continues to hurt, to know this is how he feels.

she only wishes it didn't have to be like this for him. she's never not liked living, but it doesn't mean she's never seen the light fade in people or to know people who may have never had light in the first place. ]

After this week... I'd like to try. Will you let me help you try? I know you want to stop, but... if you'd let me be selfish, I don't want you to.

I don't want to see you go down a road that I can't walk alongside.

[ Adolphe is too tired to understand what that means on a deeper level. ]

For all of my selfishness, you sure are persistent.

[ hehe ego

He sounds a little resigned though. ]

[ baps you

she smiles, hearing the resignation. it's promising. ]

I'd never mind your selfishness. You don't hate it, do you?

[ her persistence. ]

[ There's a bit of silence as if Adolphe is pondering his answer, but it's really the usual reluctance about admitting a soft truth. His voice is quiet. ]

... I don't hate it, no. Not from you.

Edited 2025-03-18 08:32 (UTC)

[ she takes that as a positive sign that she's getting through to him, at least a little. ]

Hehe, I'm glad. I hope you won't mind this, too.

[ she is holding him up, but she she shifts her hold so she can kiss him on the cheek. ]

[ Another kiss on the cheek... Adolphe is the luckiest man in the afterlife, but he can't fully appreciate it because he's currently insane (but it's dying down). However, he does feel more calm with a lot less of that hollow feeling. There's not even embarrassment, but a tinge of gratitude as he closes his eyes. ]

You do that to everyone you like?

[ But it's also hard to feel like it means something because Elysia likes everyone. Probably. This is his current dilemma about people who love everyone. ]

[ he doesn't have to appreciate it. her affection is something she wants to give. it doesn't have to be received. ]

Not everyone. I told you, I have people I like more than others.

[ loving everyone doesn't stop her from having favorites. ]

I'm aware that you do.

[ He just quietly sighs. ]

What if... the person you like more than others tell you to stop liking everyone else? What then?

It depends on how they want me to stop liking others. It's not as if the way I love everyone is the same.

[ she can be locked into a monogamy, but. ]

If they think I can stop loving others at all, do they know me at all? Do they love me?

[ she has too much self-worth to change that. her ego will always remain. ]

[ He lets out a breath. It almost sounds like a laugh and a sigh mixed together. ]

... I guess you have a point. You'll just have to cut out the ones who'd want you all to yourself, huh.

[ she tilts her head as she watches him. ]

I don't know if I'd go that far because... it wouldn't reach that point. [ in a hypothetical. ] What type are you, Adolphe? Would you want to keep the person you love all to yourself?

[ It's really funny because he was on an insane rampage and now he's calmer and talking about this. ]

... I think I would be jealous if other people looked at them that way.

[ it is, but this is what elysia wanted... to deescalate his mental breakdown. if she can calm him down by asking if he's open to poly or not, so be it. ]

You think so? Would it be a dealbreaker? Do you think you would only ever love one person? What if you loved two?

At the same time?

[ He looks confused. ]

If that's what you mean, wouldn't that just be a disaster? I don't think I can be like you and Yves.

I don't think so... not if everyone is on the same page. You don't have to be like me or like Yves. I want you to be you.

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