florescences: (5)
elysia ([personal profile] florescences) wrote2025-02-08 03:43 pm

anders catchall

all i know is that he causes a lot of discourse
spiritbalm: (BA_042)

[personal profile] spiritbalm 2025-02-24 05:42 am (UTC)(link)
It was necessary. I do not regret it.

[ pulling his hand back at this point, clenching it to test the flex. ]

Hawke executed me for it.
spiritbalm: (BA_080)

[personal profile] spiritbalm 2025-02-24 03:04 pm (UTC)(link)
[ there is something about elysia's questions that kind of provoke honesty. or at least make him feel he needs to provide an explanation. ]

Yes.

[ but. ]

I wanted him for seven years. I didn't think he wanted me in the same way. Or the timing was not right, or I was too involved with my goals, or he or I would say something the wrong way. But he could have chosen me at any time. I don't think I could have ever denied him for long.

I think I am ... easier to deal, as someone dead. But I am not really someone who can be fixed, or changed, or made to live a normal life - even if we are given a second chance. I will always be who I am, and I don't know that he wants that person when I am alive.