[ it's less the kiss that surprises her and more what he says next that shocks her. she's not so stupid or oblivious that she didn't notice how almost bashful he was sometimes before she died again, but... maybe she misinterpreted how he reacted after he died. even though she thought his reaction was more than reasonable.
she stares stupidly for a full second. ]
What? But... you... I thought I was better at... How could you.... [ come up and ask her about yves like he did? ] Claude?
[ she hasn't let him go even as he draws back. ]
How could I... continue to be so thoughtless to you?
I know. I know you care, and I know even if you lie, your well wishes for others are true. I know all that.
[ at least one of her best points is processing emotions quickly. the shock lingers, but it's fading as she considers what this all means. how much more her actions must have affected him, how he is reacting to her now. ]
It's one of the things I like best about you. [ not the lying part. she sighs, still holding onto him. ] I do love you, Claude. I just thought... if I said it so plainly, it might be insensitive after what's happened.
[ and it may be insensitive even now, but she doesn't like leaving things unsaid. ]
Even if I'm someone who can love more than one person, you already know how I feel.
[ Oof. She reads him so often, but it elicits the same embarrassment each time.
He sighs, pulling her hold away from him and smiling. Even as someone deathly afraid of rejection, he seems alright. It's not as though he hadn't known the truth for a while now, anyway. ]
I know. I also felt it every time Yves came up. [ The sappy emotionshare. ] I wasn't going to say anything, but... I suppose I got a little inspired.
[ Squeezing her hands before letting them go. ]
I'm grateful for the advice you gave me, on how to be a leader. And I admire your dedication to the world around you and all the people in it, and even how cold some of the choices you make can be.
I'm sorry for how I behaved toward you after I first died, but I'm glad that you still allowed me to be your friend.
[ there's something in her emotions that flinches when he pulls away from her even if nothing shows on her expression or in her body language. it's always the distancing that pains her. it's unfair of her to feel that way, but what can she do? that's what she hates the most: when the people she loves distance themselves from her for any reason, even if they're good ones.
she wants to grab onto his hands again. she curls her fingers into fists before relaxing them at her side. she has already done too much. she wants to ask, inspired how? ]
Thank you, Claude. I am happy that you feel that way towards me. [ true and sincere. she is grateful for his feelings even if she doesn't love him the same way. she prefers that things aren't left unsaid. everything he says moves her. how could it not? when at the crux of it, she wants to seen, to be known, to be understood even if it scares her? something in her emotions stir.
she takes a small breath. ]
I will always be your friend. I wouldn't ever not want to be. I am grateful to have met you, for all that you've been willing to show me, and for every conversation we've had—even the ones that didn't end sweetly.
I appreciate how much you want me to be happy, and thank you always for wanting to see more sides of me.
[ people get farther with elysia the more they try to learn about her. ]
... It does mean a lot to me. You will always mean a lot to me.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
Just briefly before drawing back, and explaining himself instead of answering her question, ]
I was curious to see if it really does feel different.
no subject
she stares stupidly for a full second. ]
What? But... you... I thought I was better at... How could you.... [ come up and ask her about yves like he did? ] Claude?
[ she hasn't let him go even as he draws back. ]
How could I... continue to be so thoughtless to you?
no subject
That's a new side of you that I haven't seen.
[ Her stupefied expression... is cute. He's fond, and she can hold on as she processes. ]
You weren't thoughtless. And I wasn't being a martyr back then, by the way. I did want you two to make it work.
no subject
[ at least one of her best points is processing emotions quickly. the shock lingers, but it's fading as she considers what this all means. how much more her actions must have affected him, how he is reacting to her now. ]
It's one of the things I like best about you. [ not the lying part. she sighs, still holding onto him. ] I do love you, Claude. I just thought... if I said it so plainly, it might be insensitive after what's happened.
[ and it may be insensitive even now, but she doesn't like leaving things unsaid. ]
Even if I'm someone who can love more than one person, you already know how I feel.
no subject
He sighs, pulling her hold away from him and smiling. Even as someone deathly afraid of rejection, he seems alright. It's not as though he hadn't known the truth for a while now, anyway. ]
I know. I also felt it every time Yves came up. [ The sappy emotionshare. ] I wasn't going to say anything, but... I suppose I got a little inspired.
[ Squeezing her hands before letting them go. ]
I'm grateful for the advice you gave me, on how to be a leader. And I admire your dedication to the world around you and all the people in it, and even how cold some of the choices you make can be.
I'm sorry for how I behaved toward you after I first died, but I'm glad that you still allowed me to be your friend.
no subject
she wants to grab onto his hands again. she curls her fingers into fists before relaxing them at her side. she has already done too much. she wants to ask, inspired how? ]
Thank you, Claude. I am happy that you feel that way towards me. [ true and sincere. she is grateful for his feelings even if she doesn't love him the same way. she prefers that things aren't left unsaid. everything he says moves her. how could it not? when at the crux of it, she wants to seen, to be known, to be understood even if it scares her? something in her emotions stir.
she takes a small breath. ]
I will always be your friend. I wouldn't ever not want to be. I am grateful to have met you, for all that you've been willing to show me, and for every conversation we've had—even the ones that didn't end sweetly.
I appreciate how much you want me to be happy, and thank you always for wanting to see more sides of me.
[ people get farther with elysia the more they try to learn about her. ]
... It does mean a lot to me. You will always mean a lot to me.